Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Eulogy for Dr. Judah White, By Dr. Les Eber

Les asked to have his eulogy posted - on behalf of the medical profession.
___________

I know that have or will hear about Judah as a human being, a son, a friend, a brother, and as a Jewish young man.  I would like talk about Judah as a physician. 
 
Judy and I met the Whites in San Antonio the late summer of 1968 while Seymour and I were defending our country during the Viet Nam War.  It was then that Brooks Air Force Base was forced to provide facilities for Jewish personnel for High Holy Day services.   Among other folks, there was the White family: Seymour, Martha, Judah and Issy.     To put it in perspective, two-year old Judah seemed to know only one word, and that was Omen.  Issy easily fit on my arm stretching all the way from my right hand to my elbow.  Benji was not even on the horizon at the time.
 
When they joined us in LA in 1970 we were thrilled, as we wanted to spend a lot more time with them after that chance meeting in Texas two years earlier.  Our families bonded, and there has not been a major holiday that we have not been together.  So, with Benji, now on the scene, we had truly become a large family.
 
Since Judah was the oldest and the most vocal, I came to know him first.  From the outset, he was a great conversationalist.  He was always curious about what others were doing and seemed to have a genuine love for people.  It is still a mystery to me as to why he initially elected to study law.  I was not surprised when he told his parents that he felt his real love would be in medicine. They were very supportive.   This was not an easy new road for him.  He had to make up some science courses and somehow get himself into medical school.  With the medical legal climate then as now, his law degree was not of much help.  He entered medical school in Israel and was more determined than ever to become a physician. 
 
During his visits home, I had many opportunities to discuss medicine with him.  The first thing I discovered was how far behind I was in basic science and the second was that Judah was a very curious student who knew a lot.  He loved each one of his rotations equally and had difficulty making up his mind where to go within the medical profession.  He had a UCLA rotation in student health and really excelled.  I happen to know the director of this program who shared with Judy and me what a bright and dedicated medical student Judah was.  She stated that he was the best student to come through her department.  This lady does not easily bestow compliments.  Judah loved working with college students and had dreams of continuing this work in the future. 
 
As he progressed through his internship, I realized that Judah was a master at the medical drash.   Just like our biblical scholars, he was always interested in explaining things.  By his own admission, not a basic scientist, he wanted to understand the mechanisms of disease.  Just like our biblical scholars engage in speculation, he would ponder medical scientific problems and often stretch far and wide for explanations of the mechanisms of disease.  Some, frankly, seemed a little far fetched, but all of us know that true discovery requires far fetched hypotheses. 
 
I have never had the pleasure of seeing Judah interview or examine a patient, but I have certainly had the opportunity to hear him talk about them.  It was always with reverence and respect.  He treated all patients in an equal fashion regardless of who they were and their economic status.  Those of you who new Judah well knew that he did not like to get up early in the mornings, but his experience as a house officer seemed to change all of that.  His enthusiasm for medicine prevailed and somehow made it a lot easier for him to get out of bed.
 
I spend many hours talking or rather listening to him about his Hodgkin’s disease.  Judah talked to me, as we shared a common profession, but he never demanded undue attention or even pity.  He never dragged a sole down with him even in what must have been many moments of despair and pain.  He wisely trusted his physicians, but in the end, made critical decisions for his own care.  It was very important to him that he take full responsibility for his body and not rely unduly upon others, even upon his family.  In the end, he displayed the wisdom of a great physician; namely, he was able to utilize the findings of his history, physical examination, and laboratory data to synthesize his own medical problem and come up with a treatment plan.
 
With Judah’s passing, there are many losses but one of the greatest losses is to the medical profession.  It is so sad that there are so many other patients in the world that he could have helped with his skill and compassion.  Wherever his studies would have carried him, he would have excelled. 
Leslie M. Eber

15 Comments:

At 5:31 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for posting the eulogy of Dr. Eber. If you feel comfortable, please post your eulogies as well. thank you so much.

 
At 8:49 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the wonderful White family and friends,

I, like many, have read this blog with awe, hope, surprise, smiles and ultimately tears and deep sorrow. The loss is so palpable, so tragic. Yet I know my own grief is coupled with gratitude for having known Judah, for having been touched by his short life. I also appreciate being a witness to this outpouring of support from around the world. Through this blog and your honesty, I've learned a deeper meaning of community and sharing. THANK YOU.

When I met Judah through Dave Nemetz over 13 years ago, I liked him right away. (What woman didn't?) My experience of him as a gentle, intelligent, sweet, and yes sometimes grumpy man is shared by so many who've written here. I was always impressed by Judah's maturity of intellect and his dedication to ritual and religion.

Judah and I played softball, he came to my parties and all others, we were in a book club, we went to concerts, dancing. We talked for hours and hours and hours. Judah was a major link in my LA social circle then. We even entertained the idea of being housemates, but remained friends instead :). Naturally he endeared himself to my friends too.

But Judah and I had one unique connection: Pablo Grigera, an architect from Argentina. They had met in Florence, Italy for one night in 93, and when I was to go to South America in 94, Judah made a point to connect me with Pablo and write him a letter on my behalf. He was a good judge of character that Judah, for Pablo became an instant friend too. We bonded in Buenos Aires for 3 days straight, and have kept in touch ever since. When Pablo came to visit California in 96, we went hiking with Judah. It's hard to explain how special that was, but I remember thinking then how random this was and beautiful that our lives had intersected so far away with such mutual respect and love. Since then, I've shared hundreds of letters and emails with Pablo. We've shared about the woes of Argentina, global politics, and the details of our lives. We often made a point to talk about Judah, to honor him, the man who'd introduced us. Pablo and I represent a distant voice of our cultures, while we also deeply care for one another. He is a special face in a world so full of anonymous faces. And for this gift, I thank Judah.

It's truly remarkable how Judah's life DID touch so many others'. But it's not the quantity of those connections that awes me, it's the quality. I will always be thankful for having known Judah and TO him for making his own life connection mine.

Below is the email Pablo sent to me yesterday and the last exchange he had with Judah.

with deep sorrow and love,
Rebecca Kraus

Dear Rebecca:

I'm so sad, really I haven't got words to express my pain. Maybe the main Judah legacy is that you and I will be friends along our lifes.
Un beso Grande, your friend
Pablo

Rebecca , I'll send to you the last mail that I sent to Judah. Its my memory from him.

- Original Message -----
From: J white
To: pgrigera@elsitio.net
Sent: Monday, April 25, 2005 5:21 AM
Subject: RE: my friend

Pablo,
You have brought a warm smile to a sick man's day. Thank you.
Judah

I will write more later

From: pablo grigera
To: jdwdw@hotmail.com
Sent: Saturday, April 23, 2005 8:15 PM
Subject: my friend

Dear Judah:

You know my friend that Rebecca and I are in contact during all these years. I always asked her about you. Of course I remembered our meeting in Florence in 1993. You were a blond long hair man of the sunny California. I found in you a good man that paint pictures to your young sister. In those times you were a lawyer, a painter and of course a lover. Rememberd the polish and the german girls? Beautiful girls.
I met you again in 1995 in California, in a picnic in a National park near Malibu with Rebecca and I . I always remember those times.
Well Judah, Rebecca comment to me your problems, I'm very sad but be strong, here in Buenos Aires at the other side of the world you have a good friend that always remember you. Where can I find a friend that combiene different jobs like lawyer, doctor, painter and of course.......lover.?
Un abrazo grande, and keep your underwear clean
Your argentinian friend,
Pablo.

 
At 9:14 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

From our cousin Steve Holland relayed through the Freeses:

I am so sorry to hear of Judah's death. Over the years seeing him at your parent's house and with John, he was the kindest of souls. I always felt peace in his presence.

When Karyn's brother John died at 33, we were devastated. She had lost her brother. I had lost one of my best friends. There is no way to describe this pain. I will be praying for Judah's family, for you, John, Diane, and all your family, and for everyone that knew him, that his presence shall bring peace.

Love,

Steve Holland

 
At 7:23 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The eulogy really rings true to me as I remember Judah's curiosity during our discussions about various medical and biology topics.
With warm wishes,
Joshua Levin

 
At 1:27 AM, Blogger Sharon said...

Dear Whites and loved ones,

I met Judah back in the late 80s when I was studying at UC Berkeley.

He came up to visit some friends and I met him through my then roommate, Lori Sambol.

My best friend, Traci Moxson, who went to school with the White children and, I believe, the Sambols, just received word of Judah's passing today, and neither of us had even known that he had been battling Hodgkins.

So sad not to have found this out earlier in order to send my wishes and prayers.

But glad to have met Judah all those years ago, and my thoughts and prayers are with you now.

Judah was a fine individual.

--Sharon Bender

 
At 9:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Martha, Benji, and Issi,

I hope that you received my e-mail from Israel upon hearing of Judah's passing.

If you did you know that at the time of the funeral I held a silent vigil in Jerusalem where my daily prayers and the meshuberachs of my family and friends had mingled with yours during these many months.

After that I read all of the entries in the blogsite; I had not known about them before. They were all so beautifully written that, although I was aware of the end, I found myself still caught up in your hopes and mine that Judah, who fought so courageously, would win the battle.

Our families have been intertwined for as long as I can remember - those days in Waterbury. Grandma Esther was a close friend of my mother's and also my dad's secretary. I remember Dave, and, of course, Seymour, and the people we both knew. Somewhere, I am sure that Judah is in his dad's warm and loving embrace. May they all rest in peace together - alayhem hashalom.

The comments of people who knew Judah better than I have created a wonderful picture of him......the scope of his interests and his ability to be a wonderful friend to so many.............most of all, being part of a family that loved and supported him so. The blog is, indeed, a tribute to all of you who loved and still do....sharing with everyone all of the details of Judah's valiant fight.

I wish you all comfort on this Erev Shabbat as I think of all of you ..and the spirit of Judah Daniel.

Love,
Chana
in beloved Jerusalem

 
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